Posts filed under ‘Dog Stuff’

Scooter’s Close Call & The Turkey That Got Away

01Hi! Scooter here. I know you’ve missed me and I have important news.

So last week Mom and Dad went to see Maizie in Ann Arbor. She is my niece dog. (I am Uncle Scooter.) I had to stay home. Anyway, I’m not sure when or how I did this, but I flipped or scrunched, or did something and my dog tags got twisted and caught in my kennel, near the bottom, just by the door.

The picture above is a reenactment. Since I couldn’t see what happened I asked Mom. Mom said she really didn’t notice. She just couldn’t figure out why I wasn’t coming out when she opened the kennel door. I love my “house” but I love Mom and Dad more so when they come home I always come out, shake, and then greet them, showing them my tail and attached rump, which are my best features.

Well, I didn’t come out. Since I was facing the other door, Mom opened the other door. (My house has two doors.) When I still didn’t come out, Mom saw what happened and clicked off my collar. We don’t have a reenactment of that, but she was super fast. Then I came out and shook, and you know, showed them my behind.

Mom was really freaked out. She loved me up more than usual, which is a lot. And she kept staring at me all day and followed me around. This is hard to do because usually I follow her around. So we went in circles. She wanted to see if I was traumatized. My illustrious predecessor, Madison, went a little nutso after a thunder storm zapped the power and set the alarm off in the house when he was home alone. He was never the same since. As Mom has mentioned before, I am different. Way different. Nothing bothers me. I went in my house several times, just like normal, so Mom was reassured I was OK. I am nutso in other ways. The same ways as before.


That night Mom invented a special thing for my collar. It’s called a Tag Restraint. Or a Sock Collar. Maybe we should call it the No Jingle Thing.

02She cut up a piece of microfleece that just happened to be on the floor and just happened to match my collar exactly. (The sewing room is a magical place.) My collar is 1.5″ wide, so she cut the strip 3″ wide and about 9″ long. The straight of grain ran the long way. I don’t know what that means except that the material stretched more sideways than longways so it would stretch to go over my dog tags.

03 Mom doesn’t know how to use a serger, so she picked stitch #12 on her Bernina which moves the fabric up and down as it sews. The seam is stretchy that way.  She sewed a 1/4″ seam and then turned the tube right side-out and pulled it over the part of my collar that has my dog tags.


04 So now my collar looks like a snake that ate a mouse. I have never met a snake before, but I would like to lick a mouse, and I know it’s not really a mouse in there, so I like it. Plus it makes me silent. Except for the gallumphing when I run. After all, I am a big beast with thundering paws!

05 Here I am posing with my tennis ball. The snow is melting now and the lawn is growing balls. Spring is wonderful.

Anyway, I am now Stealth Dog. Except when I bark.

That reminds me; I have a funny story to tell you. So I noticed a wild turkey in the back yard yesterday. They fly in from time to time. They have to fly in because the yard has a big fence around it and they are not incredibly intelligent and they can’t find the gates to open and walk in. Come to think of it, neither can I. Oh well, continuing….

So I spot the turkey. I bark and bark like a maniac, you know like when we have a home invasion. We have those all the time, mostly squirrels in the yard, the UPS delivery, visitors, the dog three houses down, loud birds, wind if there is nothing else going on. Mom tells me to shush. And this is where not paying attention to her really pays off. So she comes to the slidey door to see why I am berserking. She sees the turkey at the back fence about 100 feet away. Then she tells me it’s a bird and birds are our friends. Then I think she segued into a recipe for lemon meringue pie. I really wasn’t listening after BIRD. I think she said I could chase it but it would just fly away, I don’t know. Like I said I wasn’t really listening.

Then she opened the door! I was out like a shot. I chased the turkey back and forth across the yard. First we went fast, then I just loped after it. Then we sped up again. Then Mom was running after us. What a great game! I’m barking, Mom is yelling, and the bird is loving it because he’s not flying away! We have GREAT birds here. The turkey is just running as fast as his little legs can carry him, just like Saturday morning cartoons except for the background music.

By time Mom caught me by the Stealth Collar, the turkey had taken a header in some leaves. It just fell over. I was trying to revive it by sniffing it vigorously in all its places but Mom pulled me into the house. Then Dad went out to investigate. I barked from inside. Dad looked for it by the leaves but it was gone. Then we all saw it walking around by the back fence again! So Dad opened the gate and it walked out. I have looked everywhere for it, but I think Dad scared it away.

That was all very exciting. I think you should watch my video so you can rest a little. I will bark if you don’t. Come to think of it, I might bark if you do!


Scooter Simms

Pleases remember: if you get this blog in your email box, click the TITLE of the blog post (in blue) to get the video to play and to enlarge the images. Clicking the TITLE will take you directly to my blog, where all the good stuff happens.

March 30, 2014 at 1:53 pm 56 comments

Dog News

Maizie & MeMom’s packing for her trip to Atlanta so I have a few minutes.

I just became an uncle. My sister Jennie (head cut off in photo) and her husband have a new dog named Maizie. They live in Ann Arbor so she’s named after University of Michigan colors, but she is not any of those colors. She is the same color as me. Must be a people thing.

Maizie is part chihuahua and part German shepherd and lots of other parts. She likes to run very fast and dig holes. Not at the same time.

She was afraid of me at first, but then she showed me who is the boss. Maizie is the boss. Here is a movie of Maizie and me.

But more about  me. Remember how I like small places, like behind the toilet? My other favorite spot to relax is in the living room behind the couch. I like to squeaze in there while nobody is looking and then I watch TV with Mom and Dad from the opening underneath. I can only get to the behind the couch place by going around behind Mom’s chair. The other side is blocked off with a big stereo speaker.

I don’t like to back up because it’s hard for me to see around my large behind. So I have figured out my own unique way to exit the couch area.

Niki holding quiltMom’s cousin Niki, who you know from buying quilts in the AAQI booth at International Quilt Festival in Houston, has a dog and a bird and two cats. (She told me to tell you that if you want to help in the booth this year, you should sign up here. Otherwise she’ll scratch you behind the ears if you just want to come and buy a quilt. Wait, that last part about the ear-scratching was for me.)

Anyway, one of Niki’s cats is named Beijing and he is starring in a TV commercial with someone called Robert Downey Jr. I’ve watched it several times and I don’t know what they are selling, but in the Hold That Cat part, the cat is Beijing.  You should watch it and hit paws so you can see the cat part better.

I hope you have a nice day tomorrow. I will be moping by the door waiting for Mom to come home.

Faithfully yours (with tail wags),
Scooter Simms

August 27, 2013 at 10:30 pm 46 comments

Scooter’s Roundup

Mom is busy getting ready for Jennie’s bridal shower tomorrow. I don’t know why they are all coming over here to wash up; nobody tells the dog anything. Here’s a picture of Mom washing windows. Not sure why that had to happen. She said she got carried away, but she didn’t. She’s still here.

People things are really confusing. I’d rather write about me.

I have been improving. I am now a much more better dog. I can walk around the whole mall without a major leash correction. Mom is taking the picture. This is Debbie. She works with Mom. This is us at the mall. We walk there every day. (Hi, Debbie.)

We went to the Frankenmuth, Michigan Dog Bowl and I was so good I thought Mom was going to hug the stuffing out of me. There were tons of dogs and after I calmed down I just walked regular, like all the other dogs. I let Mom lead me all around and I didn’t bark or lunge at the other dogs. We went two days in a row.

There were dogs everywhere.

People too.

It was hot.

We had water and we walked and walked and walked.

And then we walked more.

It was way fun!

I’m going next year, right Mom?

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Here’s a video of me getting some toys from my new best friend, Cass Plott.

That’s all for now. I’m sure Mom will blog after the shower.

Big friendly woofs and tail wags,

June 1, 2012 at 1:13 am 21 comments

Scooter Blogs Again

Mom is a little miffed that I get more hits and more comments on her blog than she does, but she will just have to get over it. So keep ’em coming, OK?

I have much to tell you. Because I am very interesting.

And loving. I love to be with Mom and Debbie who works with Mom. You can see me right in between their two chairs when they are working on something IMPORTANT at the computer. Unfortunately I have since been banished from this position due to enthusiastic wagging when my tail and rear end accidentally came too close to the reset button on Mom’s computer.

I am also fairly clean. I mostly get bathed when Mom cleans the house which is only when company comes, so for the most part I am safe. I may look forlorn in this picture, but I climb in the tub all by myself. I can also climb out, but prefer not to because of the yelling and grabbing that ensures as Mom tries to pull me back in before my paws hit the carpet. I shake BEHIND the curtain.

When company comes it is my job to entertain them because, well, Mom is kind of boring. I prefer fetching. They throw, I fetch. It doesn’t seem to work very well the other way around. Eventually I always tire them out.

I have learned more about the couch recently. My balls roll underneath it. A lot. When I bend over to get them out, my eyes don’t go down low enough to see them, so I stick my front legs under there and try to swim closer. Since I can’t see what I am doing it is very hard to get my toys out.

I have discovered that there is a behind to most things. My behind has a tail. The behind of the couch has a nice hiding place where the balls go. I have learned how to squeeze behind the couch and hide there too. I am very quiet. Even when Mom calls my name. This is a picture of my behind, behind the couch.

Mom went on a trip recently. I helped her pack. I am not fond of her leaving. I sulk and mope by the back door and wait for her to come home. People feel sorry for me. I get hugs. Leaving isn’t good. Coming home is better. I almost lost my tail I wagged it so hard the last time.

I am getting somewhat better at not barking. Mom invented a new training tool. A while back she got a Bark Off device. It makes a not pleasing sound when I bark. Mom put it on the table by the slidey door and now I don’t bark at squirrels through the glass any more. I wait until I get outside, and then I let them have it. Squirrels run fast when you bark at them.

I will digress now. I am a strange dog. I won’t go out and, you know… do my business, unless somebody throws a ball outside for me to chase first. I stand outside looking back inside, holding it in until my people throw something for me to fetch. I don’t know why I do this, but I do. It was really hard in the winter because all my balls got lost in the snow. Mom and Dad were throwing anything they could get their hands on out the door. Good thing we don’t have a cat.

I prefer when somebody comes out with me, you know, for company.There are no pictures for this segment.

Back to the barking. I love the sound of my own bark. I bark at things that move and things that might move. I bark at the neighbors and their dogs through the fence to say hi. I bark because I am a friendly dog. And sometimes I just bark because I go berserk. I bark at other dogs on TV, even cartoon dogs. I run behind the TV to see where they go. I have very good eyesight, but I just can’t find them. Mom started taking the Bark Off outside with me in her pocket. It seemed help, but she is lazy.

Instead of going out with me Mom Velcroed the Bark Off onto a collar and now I wear it around my neck and carry it outside myself. I love wearing it. I lick it and wag when Mom brings it over to put it on before I go outside and now I have mostly stopped barking after the one time I woof just because I can’t help myself. Except when I go berserk. Than nothing stops me: not treats, not noise, not Mom yelling. She just has to drag me away from whatever it was that berserked me. (There are no pictures of this segment either.)

Oh wait, there’s one thing that will make me stop barking when I’m out in the yard and I am having a nutty.

My squeaky toy!

I will stop barking at passing dogs through the fence. I will stop barking at the school bus and the lawn people. I will stop barking at the cat that torments me so. I will stop barking and run right to my people with a happy face. I LOVE my squeaky toy. I don’t even have to have the toy. I just have to hear it. But sometimes I can carry it around very carefully, but then I give it back. (This one is a replacement for my Squeaky Toy because Mom lost my first one. Just had a test drive. Works great!)

I have to go now. I think Mom is going to try to sew my squeaky toy to something. No, wait, she’s going to write her dumb newsletter instead.

Sloppy licks and tail wags,

May 1, 2012 at 2:28 pm 68 comments

Scooter is BACK!

Mom’s gone teaching.  So I’m back on the blog.  Shhh….don’t tell her.

I thought I’d start by inserting 27 pictures of me that you may have missed. I am very good looking.

If you hover your mouse over each one before you click, you can read clever things I wrote about each picture.

Now I’ll show you a video in which I look very good. Those are the best kind. All me. A little bit of Mom, but she is only a supporting character in this production and can be ignored.

My training is progressing in the forward direction. As is Mom’s physical therapy.  Mom has one arm that is now way longer than the other. She’s so funny.

I have been diagnosed as an “obnoxious adolescent” with regards to my lunging and barking behavior towards other dogs. (I want to play with them NOW!!!) At home I am nearly perfect. I am training up a storm.

Somebody’s coming. I have to go.

Very big happy licks and tail wags to you.

Your friend, Scooter.

PS: I would enjoy your comments if you would like to leave some for me. They’re almost as good as ear scratches.

February 22, 2012 at 7:26 pm 66 comments

Scooter Simms Update

Everybody who meets me loves me. I am loveable.

I am progressing in my training of obedience and well-behavedness. This is important to Mom, so I try. Some days I am very trying.

I no longer snuggle the backside of the toilet. Instead of threading myself between the throne and the tile wall behind it (“flossing” it with my fur) I now curl in a small ball in front of the toilet. While it is a fountain, I am no longer drinking out of it. Mom said both of these things were important if I ever wanted to be petted again or give her kisses on the face.

I can walk on a leash now. I don’t yank, but I sometimes step on Mom’s feet. They are, after all, quite large and difficult to avoid.

I love walks and I get so excited I sometimes break things in anticipation. Like this plug which I ran into with my rump while I was spinning with enthusiasm for all things outdoors. (Mom said to tell you that the quilt is straight, the plug is cock-eyed.)

I now sleep with Mom and Dad. Before I retreated to my spot behind the toilet. Mom had hurt feelings.

Sleeping is upstairs and stairs are frightening at night. At least they were. I’ve gotten over it, but don’t tell Mom. I insist on a treat to go up to night-night. Before she give me the treat I sit at the foot of the bed, then she says up-up and I hop in and take my place on the edge. I spend the rest of the night working my way to the middle.

I am a very good sleeper. I sleep with my feet straight up, or folded in so I can cuddle Mom. Dad would prefer that I go back to sleeping with the toilet, but he loves Mom a lot. Sometimes I stick my feet on Mom’s head. She touches my paw and I remember to fold them up again. I love Mom too.

I love jumping into cars better. Any cars. Ours or anybody else’s. Bring your car over and I’ll show you. Then you can take me for a ride. I also like squirrel and rabbit presents. Tasty.

I have never eaten, chewed, or played with any of Mom’s stuff that she leaves lying around the house. Looks like a tornado went through most of the time, but I know all things not given to me specifically are off-limits. No “accidents” either. Not a one.

I also love baths and you can brush me any time.

I still have major issues with things that move. I wag, bark, and lunge. I’m getting better with cars and people. People getting out of cars makes me bark. I don’t know why. Squirrels, cats, and especially other dogs on leashes make me wild. We don’t know if I am happy wild or anxious wild or terrified wild because I am barking too loudly to tell. My eyes roll all the way back in my head when I bark and I just can’t stop. I bark at all these things when we walk, when they go by the window, and when they are on TV. Mom and Dad are afraid if they don’t switch the channel I will attempt to enter the TV.

Lately Mom can’t make me be quiet so I have lost window privileges. She covered the slidy-door with duct tape so I can’t see out and when I can’t control myself she covers the windows with big pieces of plastic and Styrofoam. That’s why we have a snow shovel and a step-ladder in the hallway, it’s to keep the window things up. Sigh. I hope to learn to climb the ladder soon. I’m sure I could move the snow shovel if I tried. Poor Mom.

Mom and I are working with a trainer. We go up to things that make me nuts and then we go away from them. Come and go, closer and closer until I stop with the barking. I am getting better. Mom says I’m nowhere near ready for prime time.

Mom had this great idea that I might be less nutso if I wore one of her shirts when we go for a walk. A tight shirt on me might make me feel better. Personally, I don’t know if humiliation is a recognized training technique, but I wore one of her long sleeve T-shirts yesterday and today. Apparently we are the same size, except my chest is bigger. (Everybody’s chest is bigger.)

Mom says I was better. I barked once at a squirrel right outside our door (couldn’t help it) but then I “let it go.” I also tried very hard to ignore two other squirrels and the yappy dog in the house down the street. If I barked they would surely see me and realize how stupid I looked in a women’s long-sleeved T-shirt! So I was quiet.

That’s it for my update. If you haven’t friended me on FaceBook, you should. I am very entertaining and I share a lot of pictures there.

Mom is going to write the next blog in a few days about sewing or something. It should be just as boring as it sounds. But read it anyway because she’s the one in charge of my kibble.

Please leave me a comment because I love those and I don’t bark at them. If you get this blog as an email, don’t hit reply. Click the blue word COMMENT, otherwise it won’t get here where I can read it.

If you leave a comment, you can watch my new video.

Love Scooter

September 19, 2011 at 5:46 am 105 comments

Be My Friend!

Scooter here.  Big news about me, which is the best kind.

I am on FaceBook.

Yup, and if you all friend me, I’ll have more friends than Mom! Do it. C’mon.

I am learning many things, like how to open the screen door and let myself outside. Mom says I have to stop that.

I can also open the bathroom door and let myself in. Like when somebody is in there. I have to stop that too.

I am still learning not to bark at other dogs, cats, birds, large insects, squirrels, people with bags, large trucks, bicycles, motorcycles, neighbors, and children.  Mom says if I ever want to go cool places I have to stop that too.

Mom is very patient.

She marches me toward whatever I want to bark at and then as soon as I bark she hauls my sorry carcass in the other direction. Then we try it again. Each time we get closer and closer until I can walk by without barking at all. Whining is OK.

Yesterday we walked in the neighborhood and I was perfect. Until we passed the two statue dogs. They are real dogs, but they are very well-trained and don’t move at all. They are real dogs ’cause I saw one pee. So I barked.  ABOUT FACE!

Then we met the two yappy dogs behind the fence. They bark really loud and jump so much they make dust clouds. I barked back in joyous salutation and partial terror. ABOUT FACE!

Up ahead I saw the black dog without a person and a loose toddler. I barked very hard trying to figure out which was more frightening. ABOUT FACE!

By time we were done I didn’t bark at nobody. We walked by everybody and I was very good. My goodness only lasts about 24 hours, but like I said Mom is very patient.

Mom is writing her newsletter right now. She’ll be back here soon. Don’t forget about FaceBook.

Meanwhile, you can watch my video.

August 1, 2011 at 3:45 pm 22 comments

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