Waiting for the Repair Guy with an iPhone

I’m a busy woman. Lot’s to do. Last week our garage door broke, the lawn tractor died, and the cable went out. Everybody but Sears was willing to believe me when I said I’d be home at the appointed time. Sears had to call and speak to a real person before they would drive over.

The weather was warm and the sun was out. Not too many days like that left before the snows blow, so I made sure Sears had my cell phone number and headed out to the yard to dye underpants and clothesline. 

I may be busy, but I’m not boring.

The plan was to whip off both rubber gloves as soon as the phone rang, iPhones being so blasted innovative that you need TWO hands to answer the dang things: one to hold the phone and the other to swipe your finger across the screen. I could answer my old phone with one hand. That’s progress for you.

I had the phone on top of the deck railing so I could hear it, but I missed the first call that came in because I couldn’t get my gloves off fast enough.  (It wasn’t Sears.) I moved the phone closer to where I was working. When Sears finally called there had been enough false alarms that I figured out a new way to turn on my iPhone: instead of swiping with my finger I kept my hands off the phone, bent over, and swiped it “on” with my nose.

The “Nose Swipe” is re-enacted here.

The Nose Swipe also keeps other people from borrowing your phone.

Underpants are on their way to members of the Yo-Yo-Sisterhood of the Traveling Panties who ordered them. And, fresh hand-dyed clothesline is ready to be purchased.

Look at all the beautiful Ami-dyed clothesline for making bowls! Directions, too!

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13 thoughts on “Waiting for the Repair Guy with an iPhone

  1. Betty – you can click on the highlighted link (Ami-dyed clothesline), scroll down past the colour options, and there’s the link for the Bowl Tutorial.
    Ami, I can see the repairman now – “Honey, you’re not going to believe this! Seriously! This woman had panties all over her trees. Every colour of the rainbow!” ROFL

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  2. Isn’t it amazing that Sears will call you at least twice before making a repair call, but they can’t pin down when they will be there closer than sometime between 8:00 and noon?

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  3. Did you ever, in your wildest imagination when you were a 20-something, think that one day you would be famous for dying panties and hanging them in a tree for God and everyone to see? Life evolves in bewildering ways!

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  4. Well, aren’t u just the most clever lady! (Nose-gay) Keep up the good work.

    Sears is not my fav store at all – we went thru the whole process of buying a white stackable high efficiency washer and dryer on sale (spent 2 hours) only to be told it was only on sale in RED. Went to Lowe’s instead.

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  5. Sears must have changed quite a bit…I quit using them many years ago, when they insisted that my husband be home before they’d come give an estimate on new windows.

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  6. I was so sure you were going to write that you didn’t hear the phone and that the repair guys came over and caught you standing there with rubber gloves and underpants all over your trees!

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